Stella J. Cakebread has the best name evah and she just applied to work here

Today is really working against me. It really is. One of my toxic mixtures of Inner-Chemical Freak-Outs whallopped me across the head before work this morning and I made life difficult and irrational for all inhabitants of Eşref Efendi 38, Apt 3, 2nd floor, for about an hour.  I finally made it to work, still shaking inside, quite hollow,  and had to endure several successive teachers queuing up to tell me how intolerable This is or That is and how I really must do Something about X.  I surfed the net in between annoyances, trying to track down a KLM-approved in-cabin cat carrier for Lola's upcoming emigration- something like this:



These, apparently, are not available in Turkey and Amazon will not ship internationally. Banu helped me to call various local vets to see what they had, and apparently Animalia, up by Kanyon, has airline-friendly leather cat bags for the staggeringly absurd price of 159ytl.  I ventured out in the blazing lunchtime heat to go to über-posh Akmerkez Shopping Centre, as Steph had said there was a Pet World in their lower depths (next to Starbucks!). I went there, showed the guy the dimensions I needed and he pointed up to a stack of cat boxes all at least twice the size of what I had requested. I showed him the numbers again and said it was essential for actually getting the cat on the plane and he pointed at some small cages designed for carrying guinea pigs and hamsters. I then asked about the possibility of a cat carry-bag, like the one above, and they directed me to a display shelf containing four leather cat-bags, some animal print, other faux-Gucci. Lots of embroidered monograms and Chanel-style  handles.  

'How much are these?' I asked
'450 Euro'  he replied casually
''Are you crazy?' I asked
'Do you know Tarkan?' he asked
'Yes...' I said
'Tarkan has a bag like this,' he fingered the gold-handled, leopard print 500 Euro leather cat bag. 'Tarkan carries his cat in a bag just like this!'
'I didn't know Tarkan even had a cat'

I left. 

On my way back to school I bought a kilo of green grapes because they are in season and grapes comfort me.

At school, I find a brownie on my desk, left by Steph, who had just been at Akmerkez, getting herself an iced coffee.  She figured I could use it. The grapes and the brownie are good and are soothing my fucking nutbar insides a little. Somewhere in my browsing for a cat carrier online, I found a Turkish cat-cargo site which I skimmed to see if I was missing anything vital and overlooked.  Apparently one needs a Cat-Export Permit to take a cat out of Turkey.  News to me: news to my travel agent: news to everyone.  I must call the Ministry of Agriculture and get the full details for my Cat-Exportation.  I asked Banu- who had already called about the leather cat-bag- and she called the Ministry and a security guard answered because everyone else was away for a very long government-job lunch break. He was adamant that all cats to be exported must get an export permission certificate. How one gets one, he couldn't say. Kindly call back later.  Banu called back later and they listed a 3-point plan of pre-flight government office visits. A week before we leave, we must go to the local muni office in Şişli to get her Menşey Şaadetnamesi, then we must go to the Eyüp İlçe Tarım Müd. with her Health Passport and vaccination records and my residents' permit, then, on the Friday before I leave on the Monday night, we need to drag her over to the Asian side, back to my old stomping ground in Erenköy to submit all my forms. 

*sigh*

At least by then I should have a fab-o-rama new leather cat bag to cart her around in.